Loser

I was watching Wife Swap with my daughter tonight and it occured to me that if our family went on that show we would be the losers. You know what I mean. There's one "perfect" family and one "loser" family. We would be the loser family. Maybe not as bad as some of them, I mean my daughter doesn't have nude pictures of herself on the internet and I do some cleaning, but we definitely wouldn't qualify as the perfect family.

I don't volunteer my time at some homeless shelter or teaching indigent children how to read. There is currently an assortment of dishes and food wrappers in my living room, and dust settles regularly on the furniture. I also don't sort socks until my husband is wearing mis-matched ones. I hate sorting socks. Dishes pile up in our sink before anyone washes them, and I don't vacuum every day.

Looking at this it amazes me how far I have fallen. You see, we used to qualify for the perfect family, but I just don't have the time any more. And the time I do have I seem to waste at the tanning bed or on the computer. I used to have a schedule for cleaning. Really. I cleaned certain things each day so the house was always neat and tidy. I picked up every day. I don't know what happened. The kids got bigger and messier, not neater, and I went back to work. That must be it. At this point though I have a horrible feeling that even if I didn't work full time I still wouldn't pick up the house because it is boring. I'd rather be surfing the internet.

I don't think you will see our family on Wife Swap any time soon. It would just be too humiliating to have some perfect wife and mother come into my home and exclaim over how messy it is. At least I can be thankful we don't need Supernanny in our home. Anymore.